Bringing Boring Back

It turns out this blog is quite the family affair. After seeing yesterday’s post, my brother offered to write one as well.   I love it.  So here he is, my brother, writing his first ever blog post and bringing boring back…

Boring is the new black. No, honestly it is. Last Sunday there was even a conference dedicated to all things boring in East London (Boring 2011) – it was pitched as “a one-day event dedicated to the boring, the mundane, the obvious and the over-looked”. It was sold out.

Which leads me on to my washing machine.

On Sunday 6th November we returned home from holidays at around 7pm and I decided there and then to do a long-overdue load of washing. It’s amazing how many dirty clothes one accumulates over 2 weeks – if there are 2 of you that makes for approximately 28 pairs of underpants and 56 socks, and that’s not including t-shirts, jeans and shorts. So, on this occasion I had to decide whether or not to do a load of whites or coloureds. Ultimately I decided on the latter option due to the fact that there were more coloured garments in the proposed load than white ones.

The cycle I chose (cycle 3 for a 40 degree coloured wash) takes around 45 minutes. It was close to finishing when suddenly I heard a very loud bang and a “whoosh whoosh” sound. Something was not right. At that very moment I was grating some pecorino cheese so had to stop immediately and inspect the unit to try and diagnose the problem. Regretfully I wasn’t able to. I was then faced with a massive quandary – do I leave the soaking garments in water overnight and hope the engineer comes in a timely fashion in the morning, or do I attempt to rescue the clothes somehow and try and dry them myself?

I thought, “to hell with it, you only live once” so I anxiously hit B (the spin cycle) and fortuitously my garments were given a good spin. Despite a bit of residual noise during this cycle, the washing machine finally came to a halt and with a click the machine was finally unlocked so I could recover my garments and hang them to dry manually in our living room. It was certainly an eventful evening.

Which leads me to the next part of the story.

After finally grating the pecorino cheese, I went to the third drawer of our original 1950’s sideboard to locate the filer where we keep instruction manuals and receipts. I located the Hotpoint instruction manual and to my delight I realised that our washing machine would be covered by a warranty as it was under one year old. You can only imagine how excited I was.

The following day I called Hotpoint to request an engineer, however they required the exact model number of my washing machine which I didn’t have. Subsequently I had to head home that evening, review the manual again and locate the model number (BHWD 129) and call them back. To my delight they were able to send out an engineer the next day, free of charge.

On Wednesday at precisely 11am there was a knock on our front door and it was the Hotpoint engineer. I could not contain my excitement as I allowed him in as I still had at least 2 (or possibly 3) loads of washing to complete. The engineer gave the washing machine a thorough examination which lasted approximately 10 minutes, he even took the top off and turned it on and off again to give it a test run on cycle 3.

You can only but imagine my astonishment when he announced to me that there was nothing wrong with the machine. He said the most probable cause of the loud bang and “whoosh whoosh” sound was an object passing momentarily from the load into the drainage pipes – he cited such objects as often being coins or large buttons for example. The thing is – I’ll never know what it was. It clearly is a mystery of monumental proportions. I saw the engineer out and happily started loading my second post-holiday load of washing (whites). A third wash (more coloureds) and a forth (towels) followed shortly after that and to this day I never heard the loud bang and “whoosh whoosh” sound again.

It is through adversity that we learn our most important lessons in life, and emptying your pockets before loading the washing machine is one of them. I hope this story serves to drive this important message home – please pass this on to your loved ones and may you all enjoy seamless washing cycles forevermore.

This November, I’m writing (or getting someone else to write) one post every day as part of NaBloPoMo.

NaBloPoMo 2011

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