Looking at the search results for this blog, it would seem there is a confidence crisis among those of us in our 30s.
On most days, I can see that people are doing internet searches for things like:
“In my 30s don’t know what to do”
“No confidence in my 30s”
“Mid 30s need expert help”
(As well as things like today’s “Nude girls in chaps” and “my fanny smells of wee.” Really?? Really???)
I’m not saying that the search results of one blog are enough to make such a big statement. But it is fair to say that there are countless people who are finding their mid 30s lives are not what they were expecting. Relationship problems, loneliness, health issues, financial woes… these take their toll.
I feel a bit bad for anyone who comes to this site looking for answers. I can tell you about swimsuit shopping and how crap it is. You can read me rejoice at having someone come and clean my house. I will happily make an arse of myself posing like a model. But if it’s reassurance, help or advice you are after, I’m not sure there is much I can offer.
I do know that you can decide to be positive, and that makes a difference. That will seem offhand and glib if you are in the throws of real problems. But there is so much to be said for being positive. This includes surrounding yourself with positive people. There is little point in you always looking on the bright side, only to spend quality time with someone who does not.
When we first moved to the UK, I met someone who had also moved here for her husband’s work. We confessed to each other that when the opportunity came, neither of us was keen to make such a big move. What she said next blew my socks off. “I don’t want to be here, and I make sure my husband knows that every day.”
Well, gee. A woman hell-bent on being unhappy, and a husband who I’m certain will be seeking happiness elsewhere. Excellent. On paper we should have become friends since we were in the same situation. But even though I was desperate to make friends having just moved, she was not a good match for me.
When I started writing this, I wasn’t expecting to sound like a self-help book so I’m sorry about that. Especially if you actually like self-help books.
Anyway, let’s remember how far a bit of positivity can go. If you are going through a rough patch, I hope it is temporary and you see the sun soon.
I’m supporting the Netmums United Kindness Campaign – such a great idea! And no, my part of the vlog was not all dark and husky on purpose. Honest.